Skirting 99% of your very interesting and insightful post because I'm still digesting what you've said...but, I thought I'd just say the following:
I mean, when it comes down to it nobody can make you stop writing.
Totally agree with you. No one else besides you can make you stop doing whatever you enjoy, be it fic/non-fic writing, crit, discussion, meta, art, or anything else.
I just don't really get how you can quit because of *other* people.
Well, I'll use an example from my own experience. I used to be in a particular fandom. I got really involved in it. Emotionally, I mean. Met many people, made lots of friends, wrote fic, read fic, etc. Then, a series of events happened within that fandom that I found very unpleasant, uncalled for, and over-the-top in terms of behavior. Events that made me and a lot of my new-found friends unhappy. At that point, I said to myself, "Why on earth am I participating in this forum where me and people I care about are being hurt? Screw this, I'm outta here." So I quit writing in that fandom.
I almost stopped writing all together at that point because, well, I don't write because I have some great passion for being a Writer (with a capital W :-) or grand aspirations to be a professional writer (been there, done that with non-fic, at least). I write because I want to share my stories with other people. For me, it's about the audience, and having an audience. I would be (and was, for 17-odd years) quite happy and entertained with having those stories live in my head and never putting them on paper. When I discovered fandom, I realized, "Oh hey, some other people might be interested in these ideas too. Why not write them down and share them around?" So I did.
But see, and this is only speaking for my experience here, if the audience is hostile, or if the writing I do falls into metaphorical dead air, then I think: "Hmmm, why am I putting all this effort into translating these ideas in my head into words, putting them on metaphorical paper and sharing them--an act that takes a fair amount of work, for me at least!-- if the audience couldn't care less? Or if the audience just wants to ridicule me, or ridicule my friends, etc.? Why not just let these ideas hang around in my head where at least *I'll* enjoy them, and not have the hassle of writing them down? :-)"
I don't know if I've explained it well enough, but this is one reason why people can stop writing because of other people. It's not necessarily a case of "Ouch, that crit hurt! I bared my soul, got shot down, and now I'm so traumatized now that I'll never write again!" I can also be a case of, "Gee, writing takes a lot of effort. There are zillions of other things I could be doing with that same amount of effort that would make me much happier." Or, "Gah, I had the most awful time with that batch of people. Writing just reminds me of how horrible that time was."
But particularly if you supposedly have a love of a particular art form, it's up to you what you're going to do with it.
And maybe that's exactly it. If you're *not* in it for the art form, then perhaps it's easier for your interactions with other people to make a huge difference if whether you want to continue participating or not.
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Date: 2005-01-19 11:44 am (UTC)I mean, when it comes down to it nobody can make you stop writing.
Totally agree with you. No one else besides you can make you stop doing whatever you enjoy, be it fic/non-fic writing, crit, discussion, meta, art, or anything else.
I just don't really get how you can quit because of *other* people.
Well, I'll use an example from my own experience. I used to be in a particular fandom. I got really involved in it. Emotionally, I mean. Met many people, made lots of friends, wrote fic, read fic, etc. Then, a series of events happened within that fandom that I found very unpleasant, uncalled for, and over-the-top in terms of behavior. Events that made me and a lot of my new-found friends unhappy. At that point, I said to myself, "Why on earth am I participating in this forum where me and people I care about are being hurt? Screw this, I'm outta here." So I quit writing in that fandom.
I almost stopped writing all together at that point because, well, I don't write because I have some great passion for being a Writer (with a capital W :-) or grand aspirations to be a professional writer (been there, done that with non-fic, at least). I write because I want to share my stories with other people. For me, it's about the audience, and having an audience. I would be (and was, for 17-odd years) quite happy and entertained with having those stories live in my head and never putting them on paper. When I discovered fandom, I realized, "Oh hey, some other people might be interested in these ideas too. Why not write them down and share them around?" So I did.
But see, and this is only speaking for my experience here, if the audience is hostile, or if the writing I do falls into metaphorical dead air, then I think: "Hmmm, why am I putting all this effort into translating these ideas in my head into words, putting them on metaphorical paper and sharing them--an act that takes a fair amount of work, for me at least!-- if the audience couldn't care less? Or if the audience just wants to ridicule me, or ridicule my friends, etc.? Why not just let these ideas hang around in my head where at least *I'll* enjoy them, and not have the hassle of writing them down? :-)"
I don't know if I've explained it well enough, but this is one reason why people can stop writing because of other people. It's not necessarily a case of "Ouch, that crit hurt! I bared my soul, got shot down, and now I'm so traumatized now that I'll never write again!" I can also be a case of, "Gee, writing takes a lot of effort. There are zillions of other things I could be doing with that same amount of effort that would make me much happier." Or, "Gah, I had the most awful time with that batch of people. Writing just reminds me of how horrible that time was."
But particularly if you supposedly have a love of a particular art form, it's up to you what you're going to do with it.
And maybe that's exactly it. If you're *not* in it for the art form, then perhaps it's easier for your interactions with other people to make a huge difference if whether you want to continue participating or not.