I wanted to throw this dream out to anybody who is interested and has thoughts on these types of things. My writing partner had it last week. I don't often show up in her dreams, though when I do she says I'm usually myself and play a fairly positive role. She tends to dream in very bold metaphors, and usually I can get a sense of what the dream's about. The other night, though, she had this dream and it turns out it's a recurring one.

It's very simple: We are both children in the dream, and I have stopped speaking to her.

That's it. One thing she knows is that it is a "fear dream." So it's about some kind of fear.

I figured I'd just throw it out to see how that simple thing struck people--it feels almost like a fanfic challenge, doesn't it? The only details I'd guess I'd add about our real lives is that in reality we obviously talk a lot. Oh, and also she is about 20 years older than I am, so being children is something we never did together.
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From: [identity profile] jewelsong.livejournal.com


I used to have a "fear" dream, too...not when I was a child, but before I was completely independent. I would dream that my parents were getting a divorce.

That was, at the time, the worst thing I could imagine...that my world would be disrupted so completely.

Maybe your friend is worried about losing your friendship in some way...not that you would have a big fight or something, but, maybe, given the age difference, that you will drift away and she will no longer have the same closeness.

ext_6866: (Default)

From: [identity profile] sistermagpie.livejournal.com


That's interesting--your dream makes sense, because "divorce" as a concept is a huge thing to a kid whether or not it's got anything to do with what's really going on.

It does definitely seem like that sort of dream. Since we write together it's an important relationship, maybe it has a significance beyond her other friends that way. Like we'll often joke it's a little like a marriage, without the sex, because it's a partnership.

From: [identity profile] flaxenescapee.livejournal.com


Well, when you make friends with someone as a child, it tends to be out of a more pure emotional attachment as opposed to any sort of socially circumstantial reasons, at least I would think.
That you and your friend are too distant in ages to have been in that situation together, maybe it means that she secretly fears if she is to expose some part of herself that is a pure and unchanged, or how she feels deep down and honestly to you completely, that you would reject it or be uncomfortable or upset in some way.
Or maybe since childhood is a time of change, she feels that some changes in both of your lives might disrupt your friendship, and as symbolised by being young, she feels powerless to do anything about it.


Eh, there's my worthless observation. ;) Have fun with it, Magpie dahling.
ext_6866: (Good point.)

From: [identity profile] sistermagpie.livejournal.com


Ah! Good point. There does seem to somehow be something significant about us being children. Especially since, despite our being different ages, we don't have that kind of dynamic. Like, we don't interact like a mother/child in any way. Our age differences really only comes up in terms of cultural references, things that I did as a kid vs. what she did as a kid, that sort of thing. But that idea of the "pure" part of herself--I see what you mean.

From: [identity profile] dazzleberry.livejournal.com


A lot of times, the meaning behind the dream is simply what the dreamer feels about the situation, stripping away the details. The question then is how does she (as a child) feel about you (as a child) not speaking to her? Is she confused about why you won't talk to her? Does she miss you? Is she trying to get your attention but you're ignoring her?

When I first read that, the way I envisioned the scene was kind of the angry little girl stomping and saying "I'm not talking to you-- you're not my friend anymore!" But there's a very different spin if the one little girl is sitting in the corner playing alone and just won't talk to the other.
ext_6866: (Baby magpies)

From: [identity profile] sistermagpie.livejournal.com


I'll make sure, but the way I pictured it was definitely me just quietly not talking to her, so there was a separation but not any sort of fight. I think I even asked her if she was worried specifically about what she did wrong or why I was angry, things like that, but it seemed like the dream was more desolate, like this was just a fact and that was that. That kind of goes with the child aspect too, the helplessness and confusion that you can't do anything about.

From: [identity profile] samaranth.livejournal.com


Or perhaps if the closeness never was (or was stopped in childhood), then that could mean that your grown-up relationship wouldn't be either. Which would open up a whole void of 'but what am I doing if it's not that?'

It's interesting that this is a recurring dream, and that you write for children, so you are in that world anyway even as adults. There's definitely a meaning there simply dying to be read.
ext_6866: (Hmmmm..)

From: [identity profile] sistermagpie.livejournal.com


Yes! That's what I think, though I can't quite put my finger on it. And that's frustrating because, as I said, she tends to have very bold dream language crying to be read. (My dreams tend to be more convuluted with anything emotional buried under lots of details).

From: [identity profile] go-back-chief.livejournal.com


Maybe she's simply afraid you won't want to write with her anymore? And you both being children is a symbol of what you do -writing for children. Or it could be you're both children because when we're rejected we all feel like children.

There are so few details, I can't make much more of it. ^^;;
ext_6866: (Sigh.  Monet.)

From: [identity profile] sistermagpie.livejournal.com


The rejection really does seem to be something that goes along with us being children, and the "not talking" does sort of make me think of, as over-used as this word is, a "muse." Like, not that I am her muse but that when we talk together we produce books for children.

There's something about losing a friend as a kid that's just so much more primal than losing a friend as an adult, and it seems like that's definitely more what the dream is about.

From: [identity profile] skelkins.livejournal.com


If it is a recurring dream, then I'd be interested to know what (if anything) had happened right before she had the first one. It's possible that when she first had the dream, something minor had happened to make it make sense for the other character to be you, and for both of you to be children, but that since then, that particular dream has just become a kind of standardized way for her mind to express fear or anxiety.
ext_6866: (Nevermore)

From: [identity profile] sistermagpie.livejournal.com


Yes, we were trying to figure out exactly what happened before this one, because it seemed like she'd maybe not even realized it was re-occurring until now.

It does seem like a standardized fear or anxiety and not something specifically to do with me--at least I hope it is!

From: [identity profile] jodel-from-aol.livejournal.com


Like teachers' "school dreams" about not being able to find their classrooms. Ot students' "school dreams" of being called on and their books, homework and even awareness of what the lesson is is just -- gone.

Offhand I'd say it's about being afraid that she eventually won't be able to write.

From: [identity profile] sophie-spence.livejournal.com


*very much hoping you don't mind a stranger posting in your journal*

Could it be that both children in the dream are your friend? So that she is both the "she" in the dream and the "you" in the dream - who is not you literally but a metaphor for some aspect of herself (such as her ability to remember what it is like to be a child, or her sense of curiosity or freedom or playfulness, or her inventiveness, or some other thing) that she is afraid she will lose touch with? or that she is afraid has already stopped speaking to her? Or, because you did say she tends to have very bold dream language, possibly it is a dream about becoming older? and she has cast you in the role of her younger self simply because you are younger?
ext_6866: (Baby magpies)

From: [identity profile] sistermagpie.livejournal.com


Interesting possiblity! That could certainly be true, and it would make sense for her to make herself me since I'm younger. I'll have to run that by her. Thanks!

From: [identity profile] truehobbit.livejournal.com


I think that the more recurring and apparently absurd dreams are, the more they are about very basic fears, in this case a friend losing interest in one for no reason. The setting may be bizarre, but it's usually about trying to cope with fears of loss or change or demands made on one.
(Sorry, not very insightful, I'm afraid. :) )
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